Emotions Encounter

Emotional self-awareness is the ability to recognize and understand your emotions and how they impact your behavior. It is different from cognitive self-awareness, which focuses on your thoughts and ideas rather than your feelings. Emotional self-awareness gives you the ability to see how you feel and why you feel that way, as well as see how your feelings help or hinder what you do.

According to research from Cornell University, a high level of Emotional Self-Awareness predicts your overall success at work. Research done by Korn Ferry Hay Group echoes this research, finding that 92% of leaders with strength in Emotional Self-Awareness had high energy and high performing teams. Conversely, lack of emotional self-awareness gets in the way of empathy - sensing the emotions of others. Leaders with low self-awareness tended to create negative climates at work. After all, it’s hard to maintain a positive outlook or influence others if you don’t know how you feel.

A helpful tool to build emotional self-awareness skills is to do a quick personal scan as follows. Below are a few prompts to start the process; please select one:

How am I feeling right now?
How am I feeling about a specific change?
How am I feeling about a specific person?
How am I feeling about a specific project?

Being specific is important. In the face of an event, it is easy to expand your emotional attribution beyond the specific situation. You can us this practice of being specific in almost any professional or personal situation, and it’s a tool you can revisit over and over as your situations change and evolve.

We hope you have found that there is power in naming and describing the emotions you are feeling.

• Notice - What emotions and their affects would you like to be more aware of when they happen? What do you notice and to what do you attribute these emotions to? Situation, person or a project?
• Stop - Take a pause and:
  • Acknowledge your positive emotions and how they serve you.
  • Acknowledge your negative emotions. How they serve you? How do they hinder you?
• Listen - What strategies can you take to shift with negative emotions that would better serve you?
• Shift - What is the first step you could take to best put your emotions to use?

• Practice focused breathing.
  Did you know that your body can’t sustain anger through deep breathing? Take six deep diaphragmatic breaths (inhale for five counts, hold for five counts, exhale for five counts). Let your lower lungs fill with oxygen to pass around your body and brain. This will calm you and flood you with fresh air - you may even feel tingly. Continue deep breathing for at least 60 seconds.
• Name your emotion.
  The part of the brain that labels an emotion is the same part that feels the emotion. Labelling has been proven to reduce the intensity of the emotion. Just by saying, “I feel angry,” you will actually feel less angry.
• Physically remove tension.
  If you feel tense in your arms, shake them out. If you feel tight in your chest, stretch and expand or breathe deeply. If you feel strain in your neck, gently roll your head from side to side.
• Focus on your body.
  Get out of your head for a moment and turn your awareness to your body. What does this emotion feel like in your forehead, chest, gut, or legs? You don’t have to change the sensations; simply notice the energy of the emotion in your body. If you find yourself getting caught up in a sensation (“I don’t like the way this feels!”), take a few deep breaths before turning your attention, in a nonjudgmental way, back to your body. Work to maintain a feeling of gentleness and kindness toward yourself.
• Write your feelings.
  Expressive writing has been scientifically proven to benefit trauma survivors, helping them to make sense of and accept their experiences. Putting emotions on the page of a journal or notebook can provide you with insight or a path of analysis that you may not have noticed when it was swimming in your head.
• Talk to a trusted friend.
  If writing doesn’t appeal to you, talking through your feelings with someone close to you can provide an opportunity to express yourself honestly and openly. In addition to a listening ear, your friend may have some insight or perspective you hadn’t considered. And, having social support increases feelings of confidence and trust, which will offset negativity.

Download our Six Strategies for Working Through Negative Emotions guide here.

If you would like to further explore your growth and development, please dive into Balance Point Group’s The Book of Me, Chapter One: https://www.balancepointgroup.com/book-of-me/.